I thought about him some more today. It was like he never really left my head. The difference today was that I wasn’t sad thinking about him. I just felt like i wanted to talk to him. Yes, I wanted the talking to lead but that’s beside the point. I just wanted to aimlessly walk around and talk about anything that crossed our minds. What I mean is I wanted him with me more as a friend than as a boyfriend. I liked that feeling. I liked it a lot more than how I’ve felt for the past couple of days at least. I have a competition tomorrow. I feel like I’m ready but who knows? I’m gonna give it my best. But, the truth is I’m scared.
DearJohn,I miss you. I miss talking to you about nothing whatsoever. I miss the look on your face when I would say something stupid. I miss being with you. You know I wish we could have been best friends before anything else. That way I could still b.e your best friend and talk to you. I could tell you about how scared I am to compete, or how I love that it’s raining in July, I could talk to you about anything I wanted. I really hope someday that I can talk to you about things like that.